Relationship Enhancement
What values are likely to support a long term marriage?
Marriage is an entity that should take in the feelings and concerns of each person as important AND each spouse should have a commitment to the good of the marriage above all else. This will impact the quality of the marriage and the confidence each person has in the marriage. When both have this, they have a deeper , more committed and satisfying relationship.
When this commitment is absent, the relationship has the risk of deteriorating into a competition over ensuring the desires of one's self over the desires, feelings and concerns of the other person. The satisfaction of the other’s desires must be foremost to help lead toward happiness.
Respect for the relationship and for the other is also an important value. This reinforces the value of commit (above). But translated into concrete behavior is that I don’t allow myself to engage in harsh words or personal attacks. Respect also translates into doing for the good of the marriage even though it might not represent my personal preference such as agreeing to a time out instead of continuing to talk about the issue which is what I would prefer.
Nonjudgmental acceptance of the other person is another important value. Accept their ideas even if they are different than yours. This will lead to more empathy.
For more info check out Relationship Enhancement Therapy on the web…
Boy this is a tough one as i was married and had allot of problem with all that was mentioned above, it went on for a long time with us not really loving each other the way a couple should be. Yes i did love her but not the way i wanted to love her or to be loved and so i had to come to the point that i had to decide my happiness was more important than playing the part of her husband , as i was not the best husband i should have been because my heart was not in it. Yes it was a Mistake ,but it was one that was made and corrected by us walking away .Today i find myself some 26 years later a Man that has Faith in our Heavenly Father and try very hard to live my life in his words.But i have lady that i am very much in love with that i could live with and be a husband that God would be proud off and do it with my heart not because i have to , but because i want too.But she is going threw what i did with my wife . At times i feel that i am going against Gods word , but then my Lord up above tills me to not get mad and have Faith. He has a plan, and the Lords plan is for us all to be happy we have a soul mate ,we cannot look for it, we cannot buy it, we cannot try to live it . Love and relationship is some thing that has to come from above , it comes soon in life but it may come late in life . when it comes you will not even know it, but when it comes you will know that feeling of complete Piece and joy in your heart , It is out there. It is in God's Hands and time. That is the hard part.I see and i feel the joy of it all now , is it worth the wait YES. There is a old saying good things come to those that wait. HOW TRUE THAT IS
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