Anger - R E T H I N K
R Recognize when/what makes you mad. Is it used as a cover up for other emotions? (fear, stress, shame, fatigue, embarrassment)
E Empathize - try to see from other’s point of view/other’s feelings. Have you had similar feelings? Use “I” messages ie “I feel angry when you___”
T Think - anger comes from how we look at things/think about things. No one can MAKE us mad.
H Hear what the other is saying and check to see if you understand correctly. Look into other’s eyes to show you are listening. Get feedback. (This works when you OR they are angry).
I Integrate --speak with respect and love about how you feel
N Notice your body’s reactions and learn to bring yourself under control. Learn to calm yourself by whatever works for you. *
K Keep your attention on the present and on solutions. Stay focused on behavior not the other’s personality. Don’t bring up old grudges.
Use relaxation techniques, cognitive restructuring (identifying the “hot thoughts” that increase arousal,) learn behavioral coping skills-- write them down below-
*Find 3 quotes that calm you down and write them here-
*Find 3 other ways to calm yourself and slow down your pulse before you talk over the issue - write here-
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