Responding or Reacting ?

A reaction is unconscious behavior when we believe things are happening in the world to make us act this or that way. Our energy is directed outwards  in an attempt to defend ourselves or to attack another (also trying to defend ourselves).  A reaction is a drama that is played out in an effort to sedate or control  our experiences.  The theme of all reactive behavior is blame or revenge,

A response is a conscious choice to contain our energy with the intention of using it to integrate and liberate our unconscious projections.  The theme of all responsive behavior is responsibility (response-ability).

Sometimes it helps to sit back and see what upsets us (ie "sets us up" as a trigger) and pretend that we are watching players in a movie.  When we watch a movie, we don't get up and confront the actors because they are triggering something in us.  We really do not have to have such a knee jerk reaction!

Perhaps we should greet the triggering response and the person that triggers us as a messenger of what we have been trying to hide from ourselves--usually something from the past.  This way we gain more clarity and poise and can be thankful!!

We can often reduce the flight or fight behavior that occurs physiologically.

• There is benefit in understanding and identifying both these types of behavior in ourselves for personal growth. This knowledge shows you that you have options and more control over circumstances than you realize. The effect of going through life in a reactive mode ultimately becomes draining, difficult and can even bring about isolation. Constant reacting to life puts you in the ‘victim’ role, a role that makes life a struggle. Making an effort to respond  helps you establish control. Responding takes a conscious effort and builds mind control. Responding looks at others actions and consequences and provides a more holistic approach to behavior. Responding, not reacting will get you closer to what you want.