Yelling at the Kids

This is a "parenting strategy" i hear about daily in my office.  Most know it is ineffective and leads to a negative atmosphere in the home.  I guess parents do know on some level that another person really cannot control another person even if there is a big age gap.  When adults lose their cool this is what I call "too much power for the kids to have."  The yelling actually reinforces the behavior in the child that the parent does not want.  As you gradually learn to be firm and clear with a quiet voice remember that trying to motivate by fear, yelling and punishment is not what you really want.  You want the teen to be motivated by a true inner desire to do right.  You want them to think, "Yes I want to come home by curfew because it is respectful and the right thing to do and I don't want my parents to worry because I care about their feelings".  Maybe the parent will even say to themselves, "I value calm interactive communication with my son so I will talk to him with the respect that I desire".  Try it out and let me know what you learn...